Kara DioGuardi in Place Just in Case

Kara DioGuardi has been added to the judging panel for America Idol Season 8. Maybe they need another female in place, just in case Paula actually does go off the deep end?

Kara and Paula are friends, or at least they were before the decision was made without consulting Paula. There was no group meeting to see if the chemistry was there. The final call belongs to Simon and perhaps having an extra judge will force Paula to keep her comments to a minimum.

When asked, Paula says she feels that:

"It takes the fun out of all the hard work I do to push those kids through."

Paula has, at times, been a nice balance between Simon and Randy, but there have been way too many rambles like this one:

Paula Abdul Can't Sing

We already knew that, didn't we? Paula Abdul was all about the dancing. She had a cute voice and with the aid of electronics and vocally talented back up singers, she could put out an album, put on a show, do some dance videos and be Paula Abdul. It worked, back in the eighties and into the early nineties.

Rumor has it lately that Paula is not committed to her comeback as a singer, rumors fueled by the fact that she has canceled her Today show appearances twice now. Speculation runs that it is from fear that Matt Lauer would ask her, again, if she's ever been drunk or on pills, or that she's afraid of some snafu, like the Ashlee-Simpson-Saturday-Night-Live debacle, since her single Dance Like There's No Tomorrow is so heavily synthesized that she probably wouldn't be performing it live, just like the "live" Superbowl Performance.

Who knows what she sounds like "live" these days, but this is what she sounded like at a live performance back in 1991. Sometimes, it's just better to lip sync:

Paula Abdul Won't be Dancing with the Stars

....or throwing her panties at Tom Bergeron. Not if Nigel Lythgoe has his way:

"As far as I'm concerned, Paula is 'American Idol' and our judge. It's like asking Simon (Cowell) to sing. Why would I want that?

It's not that Paula wouldn't be good at it. She would be brilliant. But she was a dancer, so why would a dancer go on a dancing show? That doesn't seem fair to me!"

Paula, however, will say only this:

"I'm hypothetically thinking about it".

Paula Hears Double on Neil Diamond Night April 29th

Tonight's show was abysmal. There wasn't one good performance and I can't believe Brooke White slaughtered I'm a Believer, the only song I was looking forward to hearing.

Thank goodness for the oddly perplexed and slightly disheveled Paula Abdul providing a bit of comic relief. It's a pity that her confusion came while she was critiquing Jason Castro, because that poor guy doesn't know what's going on in the first place, so he was probably thinking "whoa, I sang twice already?"

Tom Bergeron and the Perils of Paula's Panties

Watch out Tom Bergeron, there may be a pair of Paula Abdul's panties headed your way. Really, I wouldn't make this up - I hate the word "panties".

Paula Abdul is toying with the idea of becoming a contestant on Dancing With the Stars. The television program is on ABC and American Idol is on Fox television and the two shows share the same Tuesday night time slot, however the studios are close enough that.... well, I'll let Paula say it:

“What are the odds that two of my favorite shows are so close to each other?" Paula asks. "I can throw my panties at Tom Bergeron!"

You can read the rest of OK! Magazine's interview with Paula here.

Paula Abdul's Chihuahuas Respond to High Notes

Last night Paula, during her critique of Michael Johns, said "you sound as good as you look and the high notes that you hit, I think my Chihuahuas are going to come join you on stage". They would have had a devil of a time breaking free of that dress she was so tightly packed into. Although, you might remember that last year one of her Chihuahuas caused her to break her nose.

You'll have to fast forward through Michael John's performance on the video below to get to Paula's statement and my posting on the rest of the American Idol hour last night can be found below.

Paula Abdul - Straight Up

Another Paula Abdul flashback. This is what she was doing while most of current American Idol Contestants were learning to walk, or waiting to be born:

Paula Abdul Flashback - Cold Hearted Snake

Remember Paula Abdul in this hot little number?



It was inspired by Bob Fosse's even hotter number from the movie All That Jazz.

Paula Abdul - Dance Like There's No Tomorrow

This week, on American Idol, Simon was in a pissy mood, perhaps because he was being pressured into having to pretend he was supportive of Paula's comeback video that seemed to be what last night's show was about. He did a pretty good job of appearing supportive, when you think that they're running a singing contest and Paula can't sing. If you missed American Idol last night (and who doesn't wish they did?) here is the what the show was about, which was letting the losers know, hey, it's alright, it doesn't matter if you can sing or not! Paula looks good in the video and has plenty of costume changes to try and compensate for the monotony of the song. Oh, and Amy Davis, Joanne Borgella, Garrett Haley, and Colton Berry were all eliminated.

Flashback to the 80's - Paula Abdul at the Super Bowl

This is Paula's new song, but it all seems a little like recycled goods, rather than a new and improved Paula Abdul:

Paul Abdul Hiccups

That's all that I can remember about American Idol last night - oh wait, and Leo Marlowe. He got the gay issue out of the way immediately, just so there will be no speculation. He's likable and he can sing.

The freaks in Omaha are not worth a mention. If you'd like a more detailed recap of last night's show, check out MTV's coverage.

But back to Paula and the hiccup that prompted Simon to call her a "disgusting little pig".

Paula Abdul - Vibeology 1991

Remember this performance of Vibeology from the 1991 music awards?

Paula Abdul and the Price of Beans

Kevin Covais got the boot on American Idol on Wednesday night. Not much to add, the show is dragging.

Simon's getting fed up with Paula and I don't blame him. Last month he told her:

"Shut-up, Paula, you're really annoying me now. You are. It's like being with some precocious child."

I think Simon wants Paula off the show and he's going about it by making her look crazy in a way reminiscent of the 1944 movie Gaslight. Ingrid Bergman's character is reduced to a gibbering wreck by the attempts of her husband to drive her insane. Her character's name? Paula Anton.

Paula is blaming Simon when she comes out with things like "one had pizza, the other one had salad" during the judging segments of American Idol.

Asked about her strange behavior on the show Paula told In Touch Weekly:

“If they say, ‘Paula is going crazy,’ the reason is Simon is whispering things in my ear, like, ‘What’s the price of beans?’ Things that make no sense at all.”

“Simon gave me advice and said on ‘The X Factor’ (his British TV series), he always refers to a fortune cookie,” Abdul explained.

"He says the moth who finds the melon finds the cornflake always finds the melon and one of you didn’t pick the right fortune.”

What's the deal Paula? You've never heard of the famous Chinese fortune cookie moth, melon and cornflake story?